Anil & Meg - Engaged!

Two of my closest friends got engaged over the weekend! I couldn't be happier for them and no two people deserve this more! They have been dating for 5 or 6 years now (from my estimation) and buddy finally popped the question. They were busily calling people so I didn't want to stop and make them explain the whole "how did he do it" story, but I am dying to find out. Congratulations guys, I love you both!!

North Star Roller Derby

Well, just when I thought I had done it all and seen it all....I was so, SO wrong. Who knew that lurking beneath the Minneapolis Convention Center, such a strange and exciting world existed. What world am I talking about??? Women on roller skates...skating in a giant circle....beating the shit out of each other.....with tattoos...and piercings....and large thighs.....shoved into net stockings. It was one of the coolest things I have done in a while and would recommend it to anyone. Dave invited Matt, Jon, and I to go with him and his new beau Ryan to the derby. We met Dave's friend Jodi there too! She was quite the Roller Derby connoisseur. We sat right next to the track where the threat of death was possible on every turn. Here are some of the best names EVER found on the back of the girl's Jerzee's, the referee's jerzees, or team names: Team Names: The Kilmore Girls (the scary Lesbian team) / The Violent Femmes / The Banger Sisters (the whitetrash team) /The Delta Delta Di (the pretty ones) Jerzee Names: Block-n-Deck-Her / Camel Toni / Claudi Eyesout / SockHer Mom / Jowanna BEAT Down / Maggie McFaceStomp / Freddy Kruelgirl Referee Names: Buster Hyman / The Clam / Stripe Tease Enjoy the pictures and videos!!

Dave greeting us upon our arrival Jon before the action starts! Matt looking scared at what we are seeing...Lesbian on skates!

Me seconding guessing why I am there...scared shitless!

The group sitting track side.

The Violent Femmes lining up in front of us!

The Kilmore Girls lining up in front of us before the match. I wouldn't want to run into a single on of these gals in a dark alley!

Okay, so they girls were lining up and guess who skated and stood right in front of me. Well, actually I should say she skated in front of me, went to stop, crashed to the ground, and then stood up. That is when I snapped this gem. I think she could have bench pressed me. Notice her leather corset.

One of the refs! A little warm up video!

Jon watching the action!

The real deal!!

A video of some derby action. I started the video sideways, but it does correct itself eventually!

Hmmmmmm, someone hitting the sauce a little too hard??

Okay, this video I did shoot sideways by accident. This HORRIBLE band was playing at halftime and Jon was ready to dance for fun. Just as I snapped the video, the song ended, Jon started dancing. It was hilarious! The band played such classics as "No More Fun in 2001" and "Headcase Heidi."

At the end of the whole game, the girls come around and great the eager fans! By this time, I most certainly was an eager fan!

Us taking a picture with a rollergirl - Moxie Mayhem!

The most AWESOME of the rollergirls - Medusa! You should see this girl skate, she kicked everyone's ass!

Timberwolves Game

Jon, Matt, Dave, and I went to a Timberwolves game on Saturday. This would not normally be a blogable event, except the location of our seats were just ridiculous. I guess you can't expect much after paying $10 for a night of entertainment. In my estimation, we were parallel with the rafters. Already at such a high altitude, there were only 3 more available rows behind us that might have been worse seats if they had been taken.

However, after 1 beer, 2 vodka and cranberry's, 1 bag of deep fried mini-donuts, and a bag of popcorn (and that is just what I had), Section 219, row S, seats 9-12 definitly were the life of the party.

Left to right: Matt, Dave, me, and Jon!! Do you see anyone else around us?? Me neither!

Birthday Card

While I appreciate the birthday cards I have received over the years, sometimes a card catches you in a certain mood on a certain day and you can't help but feel an array of emotions. Today, I received a card whose sentiment I felt was worth sharing. It said "laugh so hard that you go into silent laugh mode, and you come dangerously close to falling out of your chair, but you don't. Happy Birthday. That Happy." It made me remember all of these amazing times where people in my life have made me do just that and it plastered a smile across my face for the rest of the day. Mainly because every few minutes I would glance at it and think of another example from Jon, family, friends, or co-workers. We will call them mini-birthday gifts that nobody knew they were giving me....so thanks everyone!!

Jon in Acapulco

Jon abandoned me in the cold, wet MN winter for the warm lands of Mexico. He and his family took a one week trip (yes, one week). According to the beautiful pictures, it sure looks like they had a great time. And I don't see any snow in the background, so I immediately got confused cause I forgot what that looks like. And being the world traveler that he is....he is turning around a week later and leaving to go skiing in Vail. My mom said to me the other day, "he is quite the world traveler, maybe someday you will ACTUALLY get to go with him." Touché mother...touché!!

Bruce Springsteen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hip hip hoooooooooorayyyyy!! My dream is finally coming true. Yes, say what you may about my dream, but its my damn dream! I have wanted to see Bruce Springsteen my whole life and Jon has finally made the dream a reality. He got me Bruce Springsteen tickets for my birthday!! Yes, its not my birthday today, but he will be skiing in CO, so he came over and surprised me tonight. And what a great time for a surprise as I have been sicker than a dog!

Ohhhh, and did I mention he made me a brownie cake and brought ice cream too!!! Another 1,000 points for the good guy!!

It's All Inside!

Free at last, free at last, thank God almighty, I'm free at least. After 6 long months of being belittled, price gouged, penny pinched, reported to management, witnessed a racially motivated meltdown between a customer and an employee, and explained to by a cross-dresser why Lane Bryant's jeans are better than JCP's, I have decided to step down my post as "Keith - Customer Service Representative," as my name tag so eloquently states it. The bummer is I do lose my fat discount of 20%, but to regain my sanity back, I feel it is a small price to pay!!

Dallas

Well, Jon and I are gone and back in what seems like the blink of an eye. Despite some horrible airline issues (cancelled flights, mechanical issues, being screened by the FAA 3 times, etc), we had a WONDERFUL time. It was our first time away without cats, dogs, JC Penney, US Bank, CH Robinson, cold, and we were in heaven. We got a 2007 black Volkswagen Bug and stayed in a hotel suite that had a kitchen, living room, bedroom, etc. Friday Night: After both working, airline troubles, and traveling, we took it easy when we arrived and just had dinner. We decided to call it a night pretty early in order to make the rest of our trip worthwhile since we were both EXHAUSTED. Saturday Morning/Afternoon: Saturday was an absolute blessing and was a great day in the history of Keith & Jon. 70-75 degrees and sunny. Jon and I started the day at the Sixth Floor Museum where we Lee Harvey Oswald "supposedly" assassinated JFK. We visited the Grassy Knoll. We then went on to the Botanical Gardens (the weather was perfect) in Dallas. We had lunch and then drove nearly an hour to Ft. Worth to the Stockyards. When we saw the endless rows of Harley's and cowboys, we knew we were not in our element. We decided to drive back to Dallas. Along the way we stopped at Mountasia Family Fun center for a little putt-putt golf and batting cages. Jon and I had a little wager of dinner on the putt-putt golf and I lost. Saturday Night: We went to a little hole in the wall BBQ restaurant for dinner. After a short rest, we got all dolled up and went out to the bar. It was very fun, except that smoke made us both very grouchy. We then both decided we were hungry and went to Denny's at 1:30 in the morning. Sunday: We woke up and went to the mall for a bit. We decided to go to the park due to the unusually wonderful weather. We stopped at Wal-Mart, bought flip-flops and a Frisbee and had a ball at the park. We took naps, basked in the sun, and just generally relaxed. Straight from the park, we went to Medieval Times. Jon had never been and I had been once. It was corny (as we expected), but still a good source of entertainment. Jon was a great cheerleader for our Knight. However that ended rather quickly when our Knight was the first guy killed with a sword to the gut. Boo hiss! We had a little ice cream and then relaxed for the rest of the evening. All in all, the trip was a rousing success!! Jon and I will forever be thankful for the little bit of sunshine. We got along famously and did a lot of laughing, exploring, and enjoying each other's company. Enjoy the pictures!!

Grassy Knoll Pictures

The Botanical Gardens

Yes, I am pretending to be riding in a canoe. Convincing I know!

Dallas in the background...on the outskirts of the Botanical Gardens.

These little houses were part of "Texas Town," a mini village in the Botanical Gardens. Yes, that is Jon in the corner window! Once a housewife, always a housewife!

Jon playing house!

Me kicking it Frontier style!

Jon waking up from his mud house nap!

Make me a sandwhich woman!

Hmmm?? Looks like Goldie Locks found a chair that is too small! Will she be smart enough to find a chair that's just right??

Nope! No one ever said Goldie Locks was a genius.

Don't ask! I love to take silly pictures, but never guessed Jon would get so creative. This is a masterpiece I must say!

This is a "Where's Waldo?"

Jon sweet talking his new friend...

Jon getting to second base with a female sculpture. Trust me folks that is the closest he has ever come to the real thing.

It's time for magic folks!! Jon and I have decided we may take this magic show on the road and make millions. Notice the serene waters....

Is that Jon's head emerging from the water making a ripple? Hmmmm, how did they do that?

A little closer for the non-believers!

Jon's head looks like it was especially meant to go between this group of berries!

A fish sculpture that I was digging!

My favorite shot by far! This was the best part of the whole gardens.

The center piece of the previous shot!

Thirsty Jon

Thirstier Jon...

I love frogs...seriously, why do I love frogs made of bronze, ceramic, etc.?

This frog was way too cute...I couldn't resist.

My new favorite Keith & Jon picture!

Putt-Putt Golf

We wanted to break ourselves in slowly. We were handed a hideously large helmet and bat. My baseball trading card...now worhth $.14 on the streets The backside of the card...my serious face!

Jon and I both tried and we didn't do half-bad.

Jon's baseball card...now worth a $.17 street value

There aren't words.... Jon risked life and limb in this cage. The balls were coming 75 miles an hour and when they hit the back drop, it made a thump like a body had fallen from an airplane. He hit a good 5 out of 20, a valient effort I must admit!! There are videos too folks, but they wouldn't upload. Boo hiss!!

Our black Bug! Sooooo cute!

Sunday Afteroon at the Park

Look at the form folks....this is how it is done!

So tough...don't beat me up please sir! This is serious...it was so beautiful! Medieval Times Jon being the nice guy that he is decided to share his drink with a guard. I was King for the day...

Jon was Prince for a day....

Jon slaugtering an innocent piece of chicken. Did I mention that in the Midieval Times, they didn't use silverware?

When our Knight was killed, Jon was shocked and saddened.

The Bug...notice Jon still has his crown on!